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GRE作文点评:有让步反对分层论述

  GRE作文仅靠背模板与句子是不够的,需要我们从根本上提高写作水平。中国考生写作文往往会出现一些逻辑性错误,而GRE写作最看重的也是逻辑思维能力。以下是名师对作文的点评以及写作建议,希望对各位考生有所帮助。

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  "A nation should require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer."

  The speaker would prefer a national curriculum for all children up until college instead of allowing schools in different regions the freedom to decide on their own curricula. I agree insofar as some common core curriculum would serve useful purposes for any nation. At the same time, however, individual states and communities should have some freedom to augment (改为argue)any such curriculum as they see fit; otherwise, a nation's educational system might defeat its own purposes in the long term.

  这是一种不同于前两篇的开头:先陈述原文观点,再有让步地反对。我们要学习的好句子:I agree insofar as… “在某种程度我同意此观点,因为……” at the same time, however,接着陈述自己观点……otherwise,…

  Serve useful purposes for…;

  see sth. fit, 觉得……合适;

  defeat one‘s own purpose

  in the long/short term

  A national core curriculum would be beneficial to a nation in a number of respects. First of all, by providing all children with fundamental skills and knowledge, a common core curriculum would help ensure that our children grow up to become reasonably informed, productive members of society. In addition, a common core curriculum would provide a predictable foundation upon which college administrators and faculty could more easily build curricula and select course materials for freshmen that are neither below nor above their level of educational experience. Finally, a core curriculum would ensure that all school-children are taught core values upon which any democratic society depends to thrive, and even survive——values such as tolerance of others with different viewpoints, and respect for others.

  简短说明原文观点的必要性,也为下面的驳论作铺垫,形似咱们的阅读了。我们要谨记在心的是它的first of all, in addition, finally,的结构,这是最简便的分层次论述,但不可用得过多。

  However, a common curriculum that is also an exclusive one would pose certain problems, which might outweigh the benefits, noted above(这两词多余). First of all, on what basis would certain course work be included or excluded, and who would be the final decision- maker? In all likelihood these decisions would be in the hands of federal legislators and regulators, who are likely to have their own quirky notions of what should and should not be taught to children——notions that may or may not reflect those of most communities, schools, or parents. Besides, government officials are notoriously susceptible to influence-peddling(peddled) by lobbyists who do not have the best interests of society's children in mind.

  这些论据是我们中国学生不便提出来的。但是,他的一些词句也是需要记下来:outweigh the benefits; On what basis would …? In all likelihood, be in the hands of

  Secondly, an official, federally sanctioned curriculum would facilitate the dissemination of propaganda and other dogma which because of its biased and one-sided nature undermines the very purpose of true education: to enlighten. I can easily foresee the banning of certain text books, programs, and websites which provide information and perspectives that the government might wish to suppress——as some sort of threat to its authority and power. Although this scenario might seem far-fetched, these sorts of concerns are being raised already at the state level.

  进一步阐述上一段的论点,这一点很重要。我们平时能够做到这样就尽量陈列观点,关键要有说服力。

  有用的词组:propaganda, dogma, biased/one-sided nature, undermine the very purpose of… scenario,

  Thirdly, the inflexible nature of a uniform national curriculum would preclude the inclusion of programs, courses, and materials that are primarily of regional or local significance. For example, California requires children at certain grade levels to learn about the history of particular ethnic groups who make up the state's diverse population. A national curriculum might not allow for this feature, and California's youngsters would be worse off as a result of their ignorance about the traditions, values, and cultural contributions of all the people whose citizenship they share.

  Be primarily of …significance; be worse off;

  Finally, it seems to me that imposing a uniform national curriculum would serve to undermine the authority of parents over their own children, to even a greater extent than uniform state laws currently do. Admittedly, laws requiring parents to ensure that their children receive an education that meets certain minimum standards are well-justified, for the reasons mentioned earlier. However, when such standards are imposed by the state rather than at the community level parents are left with far less power to participate meaningfully in the decision-making process. This problem would only be exacerbated were these decisions left exclusively to federal regulators.注意最后一句的倒装结构。

  In the final analysis, homogenization of elementary and secondary education would amount to a double-edged sword. While it would serve as an insurance policy against a future populated with illiterates and ignoramuses, at the same time it might serve to obliterate cultural diversity and tradition. The optimal federal approach, in my view, is a balanced one that imposes a basic curriculum yet leaves the rest up to each state——or better yet, to each community.

  Optimal approach, impose … yet…, leave … up to sb.由谁负责

  希望以上GRE作文指导能够对大家的GRE写作有所帮助。GRE作文考试不是一个能够通过临时抱佛脚的方式来准备的考试,考生应提前做好详尽的计划,然后每天踏实认真的进行复习。